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 LET THE GAMES BEGIN!

Campaigning Game Rules as updated by David L Lewis

Long, long ago, in a world that never was and shall never be again, the game of presidential politics began on the Labor Day before coming Election day. Now, it officially begins when the last polling places close to voters for the last such election.

Actually, in addition to changing the time line of campaigns, deciding who can be a candidate has evolved, also. There was a time when no one thought a Catholic (Kennedy) could win, of if a divorced man could (Reagan), or someone who admitted smoking pot and ‘monkeying-around’ with an aid in White House (Clinton) was suitable. Of course, Eugene Debs had run while in Federal prison in Terra Haute, so being a law-breaker involved in insurrection is okay.

Now it seems all pretense of the traditional rules have fallen. However, lest some mistakenly believe just anyone can run for the office, I herewith submit updated ‘rules’ to fill this moment in the midst of political time.

Here Are New Campaign Rules

The Ronny Rule – It’s Not About Age

At the 1984 Presidential debate a 73 year old Ronald Reagan famously quipped: “I want you to know that also I will not make age an issue of this campaign. I am not going to exploit, for political purposes, my opponent's youth and inexperience."

The Nikki Rule – It Is About Age

If elected President, Nikki Haley says she will seek mental competency tests for Presidents and federal lawmakers over 75 years of age. Perhaps a ‘72-hour Hold’ at some secret neutral site?

The Rupert Rule - It's About the Green

"It's Not About Blue. It's Not About Red. It's About Green.” Rupert Murdock is founder and Chairman of News Corp, which owns FOX News, Wall Street Journal, and other ‘conservative news’ media entries around the world. He proclaimed this Rule during court hearings in which his firm admitted that to keep ratings up they intentional, repeatedly lied following last election. Lies for which it agreed to pay $700-million in reparations.

The Costanza Rule – Lying Is Truth

George Costanza of Seinfeld fame offers this classic Rule: '...just remember. It's not a lie… if you believe it.' To which may rightfully be added the famous Joseph Gobbles version: “If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it, people will eventually come to believe it.”

The Kellyanne Rule – Have Alternative Facts Available

"Alternative facts" is phrase coined by Kellyanne Conway when Counselor to the president. To aid in this rule, and help readers have the facts your Party approves, example alternative facts are shown below in no particular order of political correctness. Feel free to use these, and to add your own in facts. This way we will no longer need to consider anyone else’s part of the story.

DEMOCRAT FACTS	REPUBLICAN FACTS
Radical Right-Wing Republicans	Radical Left-Wing Democrats
Radical Right-Wing Media	Left-Wing Legacy Media
Politically Appointed Republicans	Deep State Democrats
Biden Haters	Never Trumpers
Trump Phantom Policies	Biden Unproven Policies
Koch Brothers	George Soros
Ronald Reagan	Clintons
Conspiracies	Cancel Culture
White Supremacist	Antifa
Antiquated Immigration Law	Evil Foreigners
Rule of Law	Witch Hunt!

The Messenger Rule – Don’t Bother Killing Messenger

It is said that in ancient times if a messenger brought bad news of a battle or some such, the remedy was to kill the messenger. This we no longer need to do! Just keep changing media until you find one that says what you want to hear and go into the game armed solely with their facts. You will find some media which makes It’s money by telling you what you want to hear.

The Cohn Rules - If Implicated In Wrong-Doing

[Roy Cohen was a lawyer who represented and mentored New York real estate developer Donald Trump during his early business career.  A full discourse on Cohn is beyond scope of this blog.]
Deny!
Distract!
Delay!
Never back down!
Always attack!

The Judge Judy Rule - If Indicted by Grand Jury(s)

If Innocent, refute the allegations, provide your defense.
If Guilty, refute the prosecutor, attack their personal life.
If have no defense refute the Judge and/or Jury, yell a lot.

To be dutifully submitted to US Election Commission by

theCandidateForWorldsMostNearlyPerfectDaddy!